Saturday, December 31, 2011

A New Year and With It, Resolutions...

Today is New Year's Eve. I'm planning on grocery shopping, then heading up to San Francisco for an evening of post-Christmas gift giving, snackies, games, movies, henna and some sparkling cider to ring in the new year.

It's also that time of year when everyone is reflecting on the past year and making resolutions for the new one.

To be honest, I will be happy to say good bye to 2011 and hello to 2012. 2011 was a rough year for our family--we lost a couple of beloved family and friends (two grandparents and a friend who died way too young), we experienced 2 miscarriages (ok, one at the end of 2010, but really, it was close enough), my aunt had a stroke that she is slowly recovering from, my step-niece was born, but airlifted to the NICU at Children's Hospital Oakland, we've been dealing with a particularly annoying and tenacious lawsuit...suffice it to say, it's been a rough year.

Of course, 2011 also had it's great highs: finishing my first year of teaching at the JCC, getting pregnant for real and experiencing my body and the body inside me changing, watching my sister-in-law get married and getting to take a part of that wedding celebration, growing closer to both Mel and Stephanie--my sisters-in-law--and Barbara--my mother-in-law--because of the joy of putting together a wedding and the sadness of losing family members (we've spent a lot of time together this year!)

I generally don't make New Year's Resolutions. They are usually about exercising more and eating healthier, both of which are things I usually fail to do. Last year, I kept my New Year's Resolution. Or, that is to say, I accomplished it. My 2011 Resolution was to have a successful pregnancy. Check.

I've been thinking of New Year's Resolutions for 2012. Do I want to exercise and eat healthier? Well, yes, of course. But there are other, more important, resolutions out there. I've narrowed it down to 3:

#1 Survive. With our minds and sense of humor intact. In about a month (maybe less, maybe more) Brian and I are going to become real live parents with a real live baby. We are going to be dealing with sleepless nights, sore nipples, a crying baby--all while trying to maintain two careers, one in-home business, and *hopefully* seeing the end of the annoying, money-draining lawsuit. We are going to be getting a lot of advice. Some helpful. Some not so much. Our parenting choices are going to be questioned. Some challenged. It's going to take a lot of work.

#2 Don't Sweat the Small Stuff. Some people say I have a touch of OCD. I prefer to think of myself as just being very very organized. It's not like I have to touch the light switch 3 times before I can leave a room. This year, I want to remember that I am not perfect. No one expects me to be perfect. I am going to screw up--probably a lot. I have people to ask for help. Most importantly, DO NOT BE A HELICOPTER MOM! Probably, I don't need to keep track of every feeding, nap and bowel movement this child makes. She's going to eat, sleep and poop. That's a given. Try to relax a bit with the lists this year.

#3 Take Time For Myself and Allow Brian To Do The Same. The one thing I have really been enjoying these last few weeks--more than I have in my entire life, in fact--are my nightly showers. These days, they are necessary, since they are the only way I can sleep at night. But they've also been a way to give me time to reflect on my day, plan for the next day and relax. This year, I want to give myself that time. Maybe it's only 10 minutes. Maybe it's 30 minutes or an hour. But I want to give myself that me time where I can sit, read a few pages of a book, check my blogs. I want to make sure Brian gets that time too. Once I go back to work, Brian is going to be staying home with the baby two days a week. But he will also be working. I don't want to begrudge him his time for himself, either.

OK, and here's one more:

#4  Take Time For Each Other. I've heard--and seen--how easy it is to get so wrapped up in a baby that you lose that connection with your partner. I would like to strive to have a date night or maybe a date afternoon or morning, once a month, where we don't talk solely about the baby. A time where we can reconnect. This may not happen at first. I get that. But it will at least be a goal we have.

And I want to remember to get dressed--even if that means yoga pants and a t-shirt--brush my hair and my teeth, and put on some makeup each day. A little eyeliner and lip gloss always makes me feel less frumpy and a bit more capable of taking on the rest of my day.

And to end this end of the old year/beginning of the new year right, here are some of my favorite pics from 2011:
Me with my puppy

Getting to meet the Pioneer Woman, Ree Drummond at her book signing!

Brian's 28th Birthday Party
Mel's Wedding Shower (and the last time I had anything alcoholic to drink!)

Bonnie and I waiting for Florence + the Machine

Brian and I at my 29th birthday party
Getting Girly for the wedding!
The girls of the Bridal Party
Being silly in the bridal room

The newly marrieds!

The old marrieds!
All preggers with the dogs

What an exhausting year!

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