Dear Itty Bitty-15 weeks

Dear Itty Bitty,

(I've decided at this point to call you Itty Bitty until we know who you are. It's either Itty Bitty or Zebulon. And if you're a girl, Zebulon certainly won't work!)

So again, Dear Itty Bitty,

This week you are 14 weeks. Or maybe it's 15. I don't know. And I'm pretty sure that doesn't make me a bad mom. It's just that life is so crazy right now. I'm chasing (literally) after your big sister Lorelei, teaching preschool gardening classes three mornings a week and teaching afterschool Kindergarten 5 days a week.

Your existence is, well, a little surreal. I guess it's why this is the first time I've written to you. When your sister was conceived, we saw ultrasounds of her every week. I was taking hormones and pills and injecting my tummy with meds. And I was throwing up all the time. She didn't (and still doesn't) stay in the background.

You on the other hand, came quickly and unexpectedly. It was almost too easy. I expected the other shoe to drop. But it didn't. And I felt nausea, and I've thrown up (and am still feeling rather sick), but nothing like with your sister (thank god). And suddenly, I'm in the second trimester.

You don't like meat. What's up with that, kid? With the exception of fish, I can't eat beef, pork or chicken. I've gone virtually vegetarian. Which is fine, except I still need to cook meat for the rest of the house. I was thinking I wasn't having any cravings, really, except this morning I realized that I'm completely obsessed with grilled cheese sandwiches and could probably eat one a day. So, you don't like meat but love a good grilled cheese.

Your big sister is very excited about you. We've been watching a lot of Daniel Tiger episodes about having a new baby. She thinks you are going to be a baby sister. Until she thinks you will be a baby brother. It's very cute to see.

Your daddy and I are having a little more fun with your pregnancy than with your sister's. With Lorelei, we were so excited about everything that we couldn't wait to share it with the world. With you though, we're having fun keeping everything a little close to the vest. We waited the full 12 weeks before announcing I was pregnant. And then we did it by dropping clues with music videos. We'll probably find out if you are a boy or a girl, but we might not tell everyone else. Or we might. We're definitely keeping your name a secret. We're not planning on having more kids, so we're going to have as much fun as we can with you!

Time is flying fast. We'll see you in May!

Love,
Mama